"Here’s How I Learned to Be a Better Listener" by James H. Burnett III from Boston Globe Magazine (Also published in Reader's Digest Magazine April 2014).
He as a reporter,he talk to strangers for a living; love the challenge of getting them to open up. But it was happened an accident; he began to lose his voice repeatedly. The doctor told he needs surgery; otherwise his throat would forever damage. In the next few weeks, he learned to listen to his wife and his son and his dog as well as birdsongs. Suddenly find everything is so beautiful. Before the surgery, he spent time on a mobile phone. Until he recovered voice, the strange thing is that he likes what he heard.
How to be a
better listener? Firstly, He has a meticulous heart, he can appreciate the
feelings of others; he was full of compassion, he can feel others happy and
fear. He has a profound self-restraint, he can understand the difficulties of
others, forgive the mistakes of others, to tolerate the faults of others. Secondly, he
has good patience, and ability to listen to others messy, immature, even
incoherent, contradictory views for a long time. He also has to discovery and
absorb other people's enthusiasm and the abilities ideas, because when people
have concerns and suspect, he can sincerely and kindly encourage them to
continue; Thirdly, when people occasionally say interesting, he would give a
knowing smile; When others speak out some good ideas, he will continue nodded;
When someone tries to say something to express thoughts, he would attentively
listen, and from time to time ask some didn't catch that question. Lastly, When
someone's speech ended, he will take someone else was talking about finishing
well organized, and be absorbed them. Because of these good qualities, the clever
talker often propounded and detailed understanding of all kinds of people. His
language can often be very effective touching. Thus, no matter what people see
him, are willing to put him as a good friend, willing to reveal his own
thoughts, hid himself in the hearts of intense pain, troubles pour out to him,
hoping to get his sympathy, comfort and assistance .
In conclusion,
a clever conversation must also be modest and courteous. No matter how others
admire him, admire him, he should be the attitude of humility, open-minded.
Similarly, a small-minded only had room for himself, but also
unpopular. Not to published others judgment and emotional conversations,
comments, always on a neutral attitude. Remember, sometimes non-verbal
transmission of information you can express your position, but must not be
expressed in the language, which is the most important. If you try to go beyond
this limit, there is danger to listening the wrong places, make that a loss of
direction and meaning of the conversation. I think sometimes in the process of
listening, you can learn a lot of knowledge, so that you become more mature and
more popular in the crowd.
Read more: http://www.rd.com/advice/relationships/how-to-be-a-better-listener/#ixzz3GYkUKagG
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